__khAi *
.è Being.
Eilsakhai 'khAi' DruMetal
240389
Create Talents Model
Combat Medic
Percussionist - Drummer
recuperating heartbreak
relish.
smile and beguile
growing old with her
Lamborghini Reventon
.dilemma.
Diena
Wishlist
SAF: serve and fuck off
modelling career
PI
Subaru Impreza WRX STI 2.5
drumset
whole new wardrobe
shirts
shirts: Raoul
pants, jeans, trousers, bermudas, shorts
wallet
shoes
sandals
watch
watch: TagHeuer - Microtimer
belts
belts: tough
eyewear
eyewear: Oakley - Romeo 2.0
ignorance is failure.
Archives
May 2006
June 2006
July 2006
August 2006
September 2006
October 2006
November 2006
December 2006
March 2007
April 2007
May 2007
July 2007
September 2007
October 2007
January 2008
March 2008
April 2008
May 2008
June 2008
October 2008
November 2008
December 2008
January 2009
why i cry
Darling,
ever be the lover that you long for,
doing as you would the other do.
each day each second i still love you,
seeding what that makes one - out of two.
such love of being is the canopy,
under which all things above all shall wedded be.
The sacrifice of time and strength,
of preference and good of deeds,
and of help, but love? may calm
the winds and storm that roil the restless sea.
Everything one does, like dust,
transforms be the light in which we all live.
But happiness, my Dear, is not a gift,
It is within one's power to give.
One can only love, and be
A witness to the life that each,
at last must live alone, for
Well or ill beyond a
Diena, i hope there still is the light, in which u brought in not faded but gone. I still do pray for us. Cos i still do fucking Love you.
|| little too much.. ||
i was before, holding up my walls so high
you and i, we started falling in love; and i
thought of you to be with till the end of time,
and never, ever would i think or speak of goodbye.
but love makes people do stupid things,
and once this impregnable infatuation, pry
then i never thought i could be so weak,
weak enough to cry.
-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-
baby, i noe its hard. im not easy myself all the time. my problems, paranoia, fear, they come and interfere.. i hope u noe - and u noe urself - that, before us, u have felt wats like to feel miserable inside u bcos u noe u wen u love someone, it would take anything to heal, to forget, and to love again.. but as for me, tat whole thing was but far long ago.. for years i waited for someone tat could levish pebbles of beau into my heart.. for long tat i waited - until i found you... and i noe, this time, i gotta be ready for the future.. i was young, still am young, and still learning of what's reality's gonna be when im finally tested and opened to it.. now tat im with u, my loved one, just about anything can happen.. bcos it means Love. and Love makes ppl do stupid things.. but tat aint awfully true, cos if a knot is entirely secured, no force can untie it.. thus the deep feeling, affection, romance, belonging, Love, all can but stop any wave of negativity if the devil of cupid tries to point a poisoned arrow into our relationship.. but wat the heck, we're both humans.. we make mistakes.. tats where we - people - are like teabags, put into hot water to test how good they are.. hence the essay of patience.. but nonetheless, if one forgo with trust, and echoes with angst, definitely a love's tie is broken.. definitely..
baby.. i need to bring myself up whenever i fall.. but if i fall too hard, i will need you.. these problems they batter me.. they impulse on my being.. at times, they hurt; and they hurt bad.. its not like i cant understand how i will affect u bcos of my own situation... but i always try and do myself good - at least - and at least, i wont affect u.. but u noe, sometimes, u get into trouble; big time.. and ur affected inside u.. and u try to bring all this shit out, away from u..as far away as possible.. u prevail at times, but not all the time.. so u'll end up feeling all so grievous and all so shitty... and all fucked shit orbits in ur mind.. u become quiet.. u keep urself from others.. because u try not to affect them.. but im no saint.. i have my own weaknesses.. i hurt myself, and sometimes.. i hurt others around me too.. and cause unnecessary stupid things to happen.. i jus feel so fukkin sorry because i jus cant stop myself from hurting u sometimes, baby.. im so sorry..
pls bring back the times wen i hold u in my arms..
wen i feel the warmth and affection u give to me..
i need myself to deal with my own negativity..
and i'll need you to bring life into me wenever im down..
pls dun think tat im too bz of my own..
u should noe tat im all into u..
but i need to work things out for my own future..
one thing's for sure..
I will never leave you all alone..
Not a moment for u to think tat im against you..
And for every negation done, im there to condone, to forgive all of you..
For you, baby..
And i want you to know..
That i..
will always..
Love you..
______________Live this heart for me, baby.. <3 <3 <3
______________I give my heart to you.. <3 <3 <3
breathing still... @ 4:04 PM
___________________________________________