__khAi *
.è Being.
Eilsakhai 'khAi' DruMetal
240389
Create Talents Model
Combat Medic
Percussionist - Drummer
recuperating heartbreak
relish.
smile and beguile
growing old with her
Lamborghini Reventon
.dilemma.
Diena
Wishlist
SAF: serve and fuck off
modelling career
PI
Subaru Impreza WRX STI 2.5
drumset
whole new wardrobe
shirts
shirts: Raoul
pants, jeans, trousers, bermudas, shorts
wallet
shoes
sandals
watch
watch: TagHeuer - Microtimer
belts
belts: tough
eyewear
eyewear: Oakley - Romeo 2.0
ignorance is failure.
Archives
May 2006
June 2006
July 2006
August 2006
September 2006
October 2006
November 2006
December 2006
March 2007
April 2007
May 2007
July 2007
September 2007
October 2007
January 2008
March 2008
April 2008
May 2008
June 2008
October 2008
November 2008
December 2008
January 2009
why i cry
Darling,
ever be the lover that you long for,
doing as you would the other do.
each day each second i still love you,
seeding what that makes one - out of two.
such love of being is the canopy,
under which all things above all shall wedded be.
The sacrifice of time and strength,
of preference and good of deeds,
and of help, but love? may calm
the winds and storm that roil the restless sea.
Everything one does, like dust,
transforms be the light in which we all live.
But happiness, my Dear, is not a gift,
It is within one's power to give.
One can only love, and be
A witness to the life that each,
at last must live alone, for
Well or ill beyond a
Diena, i hope there still is the light, in which u brought in not faded but gone. I still do pray for us. Cos i still do fucking Love you.
|| think the why.. ||
i came to think of why i do think..
and it struck me that sometimes it drives me nuts.
dont understand the part where emotions get involve with the thoughts i have.
in trade, mindless propaganda starts to orbit. now... that's when someone goes from conscious, to haywire.
i dont really agree to what i see these recent times. hating to call it 'the pot calling the kettle black'.
i gave it up, time before and time again. but before it was like.. remorse. but now, probable perpetual vile might occur. scary? no. pretty much disgust in the human mind.
one thing: the undercurrent. the unseen probable uncouth upsetting undercurrent in us. all of us.
no, u dun realise it actually happens. the irony is it creates the disbelief to one's own opinion of virtue. really.. now this is scary. because why? because this is commonly known as the 'true colors' ... yes..
put it this way. one moment u see him/her dying to brush ur hair back trying to make u feel comfortable but the next moment u see him/her swearing back at u because u did something unreliant. see, this is the part where undercurrents may not turn inside out, instead surface as calm currents like u normally see by Marina Bay. *lol!* this intents the accumulation of backstabbing thoughts which usually do occur in young minds like you, maybe me. =P
the one thing i become oblivious to is the pace and time taken for that 'undercurrent' to start pouring out obviously! like maybe haemorrhaging!! and this kinda things can actually happen - from that person next to u! - "ur love, ur heartthrob, ur whatever-mushy-shit-u-wanna-call-it".. *and that tag lights up on ur forehead: 'what?!' *-- yeah.. : scorn. read it back again to understand.
well here.. i dun wanna sound so blabberish. but look at ^yourself^ in "the eyes".. if u really have the emotions and call them names like love - to love, care - to care, sad, happiness, joy, or whatever.. .., then mayb u should start thinking if such poignant emotions is for u to feel from a foreign source.
see.. since that night, i see the repetition of me suing
and thus:
hence: the preempt notoriety amongst fellow peers.
ergo: my own early confusion.
now i sing songs, lyricist to the melodies, instrumenting the scores.
that word 'undercurrent' made a why, seemingly i thought.
and i stool staring back at my silhouette on e floor......
where was i when it mattered. what was i when it mattered. fuck it, bitch. what matters to that mind? so much for believing it, my efforts dont even move a notch; to you? Fuck you. im happy now. with my own. *facades from your undercurrents*
--" gosh__:
--" gosh__:
breathing still... @ 2:23 AM
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